Fanfic:We Are Never Doing This Again

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We Are Never Doing This Again
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The door to the First Seeker's chambers opened as a brawny Gaidin pushed his way inside. "I don't like it," Rav grumbled, "but she said yes."

From the centre of the room, a pair of green eyes peered up. "You had to ask?" There was a touch of mocking in Elia's voice.

Rav frowned. "Of course. I am bonded after all. Just because I'm the Gaidin Captain doesn't mean I'm free to accompany anyone like I used to."

Elia rose from her seat with a smile on her face. "Look at you, all domesticated."

"'Bring him back in one piece. You don't want to know what happens to a woman when she loses her fifth Warder.' Her words, not mine."

"Well," Elia said lightly, "we best get started, so you can be back in time for walkies."


The two Darrows made an awkward pairing as they moved through the Grey Tower. Ravak Darrow looked nothing like the boy that had come to Hama Valon almost two decades ago. He seemed to stroll casually, his steps light in his Aiel-made boots. Thick, calloused fists encompassed the hilts of his two swords at seeming ease, but his pale blue eyes seemed to watch everything warily. He'd been skinny once, but now his muscles were clearly defined through his pale grey shirt. Gold shone both from his badge of office, and from a sinuous animalistic shape that encompassed his right forearm. He seemed like a living weapon, ready to strike without remorse at the first sign of danger.

Elia had also changed since escaping the White Tower for the benevolence of the Grey. She had been sweet, quiet, and law-abiding to a fault when she first donned the white dress of a novice. Now her moods were tempestuous, and she seldom held back her thoughts. The honesty that the Three Oaths enforced upon her didn't seem to have tempered her tongue, but instead liberated it. It was an odd thought, but Ravak was sad that her liberation had been impeded as of late. Elia had been tortured in some backwater village, leaving her with a horrific injury that afflicted her right arm. She wouldn't speak of it, but she was wary in a different way to her Gaidin brother. When Ravak saw a shadow, he would rush forward to confront it. When Elia saw a shadow, she would run to the nearest light.

There were other things too that separated them. Ravak was plainly and functionally dressed: pale grey shirt, brown trousers, fancloak. Elia was like a living painting, vivid in a dress of scarlet, moonstones adorning her flowing red locks. That she was pregnant did little to deflect from her beauty. It was the arm concealed by an overly long sleeve that did more to sully that.

"Will you tell me where we're going now?" the taller of the two Shienarans asked. "A short trip to an abandoned village sounds precisely like the start of a bad idea."

"Does it matter?" Elia haughtily countered. "We will Travel straight into the centre of the village. If I'm right, we will be there for a few hours at most, then we can Travel straight back here to the Tower. If we see anything more than a pigeon, it would surprise me."

"And you know this how? You aren't a Dreamer last time I checked, nor do you have those vision... things."

"Foretellings? No, I am neither a Dreamer nor blessed with Foretellings. But I'm telling you, we should be fine. And it is important."

Rav just nodded. Sometimes a simple statement was enough to convince him. With Mia, he could feel her thoughts and convictions. With Elia, the Three Oaths ensured the veracity of her claims. The Gaidin rolled his shoulders. "And we're looking for a ter'angreal? What does it look like?"

"A mail or plate gauntlet, possibly with an attached vambrace. In a place like where we are going, it should stand out. It will be unblemished by rust, so just keep your eyes open for anything shiny."

"Shiny," Rav muttered, "Right."


The slash of silver light rotated open into a square hole in reality. Cold air rushed through from the other side of the Gateway as the weather front of western Andor clashed with... wherever they were going. Ravak strode through the opening first, taking point. His boot crunched down on thick snow on the other side of the opening, but the air wasn't freezing. A few bloody hours, Rav thought wryly. Any more and we'll be icicles. Not quite true, but Elia could at least have warned him about the temperature.

Wherever this cold place was, it seemed as deserted as Elia had expected. He stood in the midst of a village green. It was bordered on three sides by unfamiliar buildings, but he could make out a town hall, and a tavern. There were large glass fronts on some of the buildings, which had probably been shops at one time. Had been because the village was abandoned. Moss grew around everything. Some of the doorways lacked doors, and on many of the others, the doors were ajar or wide open. The same was true of the window shutters.

Elia crossed through from the Grey Tower and then the Gateway was gone. Miahala seemed to nearly vanish from his awareness completely. For the first time in three months, Ravak felt very alone.

The smaller Shienaran looked around her destination and shuddered. Rav frowned. Shuddering was something an Aes Sedai or a Gaidin could suppress. "What's the matter?"

"This reminds me of Vaidulo," Elia bemoaned. Her malachite eyes were wide as they took in house after house. Eventually she settled on the town hall. "Let's start here."

Ravak moved ahead of his elder sister, entering the town hall a few moments before her. One door was gone, whilst the other was wedged open by a block of wood. The wood around the bottom of the door looked rotten, and it was just as likely the door would remain in place without the doorstop.

The interior of the hall was one large room, with a ceiling two stories in height. The upper floor existed only on the periphery, allowing a couple of rows of people to look down at whatever was happening below. Ravak scanned the balconies for any sign of life but there was none. A raised dais stood at the far end of the room, but beyond that the hall seemed bare. Some of the flooring had warped over the untold years, leaving the ground uneven. The Gaidin stepped carefully, making sure not to make a sound.

Elia ruined that. Her first few steps drew out a number of creaks from the floorboards, earning her a disgusted glare from her would-be bodyguard. She shrugged, although whether that was in apology or in annoyance was unclear. Rav moved towards the rear of the hall, eyeing a closed door that stood in the centre of the back wall.

The handle turned as he pushed down, and for a wonder the door still functioned. It creaked as he opened it. Rav could practically feel Elia's judging eyes on the back of his neck, but he gave her no mind. The door led into... well, he wasn't sure. There were three tables with a chair in front of each. A few small boxes sat across the three desks, and there was a dried-out inkwell on the one furthest to the left. An office? Ravak approached the nearest seat, prodded it in a check of suitability, then sat down. Thankfully for both his rear and his pride, the chair did not collapse under his weight.

Sliding the nearest box across the desk, Rav thumbed the clasp open. He angled the front of the box away as he opened it, mindful of the lessons that Jaryd had told him about wards. Nothing beyond the ordinary happened, so Rav drew the box closer and started looking through its contents.

"Letters," he mumbled to himself. The handwriting seemed stylised, although not in a fashion he was familiar with. It was still legible enough, fortunately. The top letter seemed to be a request for more conscripts. He didn't recognise the name at the top of the missive, although it was addressed to the mayor. Mayor of where, he wondered. And who was this conscription for? The bottom of the letter had suffered from water damage, so the last lines were just a series of dark smudges. No name and no House to work on. Rav placed the first note aside and kept reading.

The undamaged parts of the letters he looked at were all common fare for a village of this size. Reports about the local storehouses, transcripts of criminal tribunals held by the mayor, letters from residents about mundane matters. There were a few oddities in amongst all of it. Turns of phrase that he didn't understand. Names that seemed unusual. He couldn't place where they were from all of this, not even down to the country. This had to be one of the Borderland nations in all likelihood, but he couldn't place which one. Nowhere near Fal Dara, that much is for damn certain.

He tipped out the rest of the box, emptying water and what was once paper onto the tabletop. Resting the undamaged missives on the bottom of the upturned box, Ravak reached over for the next one. His motions were accompanied by a creak, but he knew he wasn't the source of the noise.

Time seemed to slow as the Shienaran pushed away his questions about the village. He compressed his curiosity and confusion and shunted it aside. He did the same with his other thoughts and emotions, leaving only a void. This was the ko'di, the nothingness that allowed Ravak and his fellow Borderlanders to fight beyond normal limits.

As he rose up from his seat, he kicked out backwards, propelling the chair towards whatever was behind him. Turning in a half-circle, the Gaidin Captain's blades fanned out in a showy display. The shorter length of folded steel in his left hand had notches along one edge. The longer weapon was marked with the Great Serpent on one side and the Flame and Fang on the other. It left no question about who or what Ravak Darrow served.

The Warder's blue-grey eyes at last fell on his opponent, and even within the depths of nothingness there was shock. Wood struck against the front of a living statue. Blackened scales slid across one another as it stepped forward. Red tipped the edges of its natural armour, and an elongated red crescent-shaped antenna rose from its face. Dark red mandibles were in the place of a human's jaw and--

Grey eyes widened. The face was not a face, but a helmet. It was alien to the Gaidin, but it shared properties with the Seanchan soldiers he'd seen attacking the Grey Tower. Antenna, mandibles, scales -- we're in bloody Seanchan?!

There was no time for outrage. The Seanchan soldier was alarmed with a lacquered length of wood, topped by a curved blade. Very few people trained with an ashandarei. Putting that together with the full scale armour and Rav knew he had a fight on his hands.

The bladed tip of the Seanchan's weapon moved like a snake in the initial few parries, challenging the Gaidin's defences. Rav ended up walking into the table, forcing it backwards as he needed an extra few inches of space to properly push away his opponent's attacks. The extra reach that the ashandarei provided was countered by the addition of the Gaidin's second sword. The additional weapon allowed him to block and strike out at once, but the increased distance between speartip and wielder afforded the Seanchan more time to react and counter.

The ashandarei's blade rose up high, then smashed down into the space Rav had just rolled away from. For the briefest moment the polearm was caught by a notch from the Shienaran's blade, but the girth of the pole exceeded the size of the notch. Pulling his sword-breaker back, Rav lunged out with his longsword. The edge stuck off the black and red armour as if parried. He'd have to do better to land a successful blow onto his opponent. Unfortunately his foe didn't need the same luck.

The spear blade sliced through the air in a horizontal sweep, forcing Rav backwards. With a step forward, the Seanchan twisted his weapon mid-swing and brought the weapon back through the air again. Rav jumped away, then rushed in as the Seanchan attempted to make slash number three. The Gaidin aimed at two spots; a gap between the soldier's scales at chest-height with his sword-breaker, whilst he targeted the man's (woman's? Who knew?) face with his sword's pommel.

A mandible bent out of place just before the weapon hilt struck true. There was a suppressed grunt of pain. We'll go with a man then. Out of the Gaidin's immediate vision, the sword-breaker found a gap between two of the red-tipped scales, but it barely moved beyond that point. He had no opportunity to consider what that meant as he pushed back away from the Seanchan before the soldier... well, whatever it was, Ravak was better with his blades than with anything else.

He took the momentary cessation of clashing blades to get out from the small office. He spared a glance to look over his shoulder as he re-entered the main hall. His charge -- his pregnant sister -- was nowhere to be seen. That was all the time he had to spare before the ashandarei and its wielder demanded his attention.

With room to move, Ravak used his honed repertoire of attacks learned and earned in the Yards and on the battlefield. He started by raising both swords high above his head in the Hawk Surveys the Plain. The form invited an attack, and it was an attack he got. Rav spiralled past the advancing blade as he pulled the Rose Unfolds straight from Kubotai Gaidin's playbook. His longsword arced down towards the Seanchan soldier's head, but just before it landed its attack, he angled the blade further groundwards. Black scales shattered as the sword tore into the leather underneath. He'd created an opening, nothing more, but it was a start.

Rav pulled away, recentering himself for the next attack, as the Seanchan pulled his ashandarei to his side. The long shaft was still next to the Gaidin and it took little for the Seanchan to make his blade score a long line across Ravak's side. Blood soaked quickly into the pale grey of his shirt, but the Gaidin didn't outwardly react. The ko'di kept the pain from affecting his judgement, but there was a white-hot fury waiting to break through that bubble of nothingness. Letting the pain in meant the end.

Many years ago, Rav had learned a little about using a quarterstaff as a weapon. He dug deep into his memories about how to use one, saying the only difference between one polearm and the next was the metal bit at the end (or lack thereof).

The two warriors clashed again in a series of unsuccessful strikes. Rav stepped further back into the hall, leaving a trail of blood that the Seanchan followed.

It may have been mere moments since he kicked the chair into the man, or maybe hours. Time had an odd flow within the ko'di. Either way, his current strategy wasn't working, and even if his mind could resist succumbing to pain, his body was going to weaken the longer this duel continued.

Rav opened a hole in his mental guard. Pain seethed inside, and with it came anger. He had used anger as a weapon before. He had bested Dax using anger. He had bested Darkfriends using anger. The anger had saved Vari Sedai from the hands of Whitecloaks. Ravak prayed it would save him yet again.

The Gaidin's attacks ceased to be calculated and started to become infuriated. He had worked long hours over many years to build up his muscles, and now he used every fibre of them to batter away at the Seanchan. The blackened form for once found itself on the back foot, retreating under the barrage of blows. Striking with two blades, the blade of the ashandarei was no longer enough to deflect all of the blows. He was forced more and more to use the blunt end of the exotic weapon to attack, effectively reducing it to a mere quarterstaff. Oh, a quarterstaff could still be lethal, but it was a weapon Ravak was more familiar fighting against.

Willow Embracing the Breeze was followed by the Red Hawk Takes a Dove. Rav moved within striking distance of the man's chest, but he instead used both swords to strike at the arms. One hand loosened its grip, and the Grapevine Twines finished the disarmament. The Seanchan only had one hand on his weapon, and a polearm that size was only good in two arms.

Cutting the Clouds; Rain in High Wind; The Wind Blows Over the Wall. All of his attacks were aimed at exploiting the weakened flank of his opponent. The pain from his injury twisted a knot in Ravak's chest. It fed into his anger, but it also fueled desperation. The agony soared with each and every move, edging the Shienaran closer to enfeeblement.

Something changed. It took the Gaidin a long moment to notice in the midst of his deadly attacks. The Seanchan stumbled back and dropped down to one knee. His injuries were more severe, although each combatant was facing death down the length of a long corridor.

Ravak stepped away. The Seanchan angled his weapon like a boar spear, ready to skewer the Gaidin if he got too close. Using his other hand, he tugged off his helmet. Dark eyes and pallid skin faced him.

"I will gladly die for the Empress." He spat out blood from his earlier encounter with Rav's pommel. "And you shall join me in the grave."

The Gaidin returned his sword-breaker to its sheath. "I doubt that," Rav grumbled. Using just his longsword, Rav lashed out with the Serpent Strikes. His longsword soared through the intervening space between them before finding purchase in the gap of scales around his sternum. Bone and flesh seemed no impediment for the Tower-forged blade. The andandarei and the soldier's face both fell groundwards.

Rav stepped towards his defeated foe and retrieved his longsword. The Shienaran took hold of the ashandarei, using it as a walking stick as he moved towards the front of the building.


Elia knelt on the ground, eyes cast down towards the snow-covered cobblestones. The cold had easily permeated her dress and her knees were sore from the hard stone underneath. She felt sick and scared. Without meaning to she once again reached up towards the collar around her neck, and once again she was reminded about the folly of such an act.

A pointed heel struck into her side a moment after the mistake. The Aes Sedai wheezed from the pain but did nothing else. If there was one thing Elia had learnt as of late, it was when she was defeated. If there was another thing Elia knew, it was ter'angreal. The one around her neck would not come off except under certain circumstances, and she had no power in making any of those circumstances come about. All she had was patience.

And hope.

The sound of something approaching made her look up. There was a jerk on the collar around her neck, but there was no blinding agony that came alongside it. Instead the sul'dam crooned. "Here comes your precious bodyguard." The sul'dam did not believe her Deathwatch Guard could have failed. Elia prayed to the Creator and to the Dark One that he had.

The tapping noise of wood on wood chilled Elia to the bone. The rhythmic pattern was all too familiar. The outline of a figure appeared in the doorway to the town hall. She saw a staff and a man walking crookedly. Murdock. She was going to be a slave to Murdock. Light, how?! How!

Her untempered fear vanished just as quickly as it had started. It was not the Keeper of the Archives who emerged from the shadows, but her brother. He was using a spear as a walking stick and blood coated one side of his torso, all the way down his trouser leg. She sucked in a breath. She prayed for salvation.

In the same moment she opened herself to saidar. No, she didn't do it, but she was forced to do it. Involuntarily she took hold of the One Power and began to form weaves. Green and red strands appeared in front of her panic-stricken face. "No, nonono!"

A ball of fire formed in the air and shot towards Ravak. With a grace that seemed impossible from someone so badly injured, he turned the sword tip of the staff into the path of the weave. Fire exploded out from the impact. When the blinding flash cleared, Ravak was four steps closer. His face was like death made manifest.

One fireball wasn't enough for the sul'dam. Her nameless mistress forced the Shienaran to weave again. Green and yellow. Rock shards formed in the air, then darted out like arrowheads. Again Ravak surprised her with his speed as several shards found purchase in the wooden shaft of the spear, but others drove right into his chest. He merely grunted and unflinchingly marched on.

Pain bloomed in Elia's skull. It had nothing to do with the a'dam, and for once the Indigo was glad of her weaknesses with the One Power. Earth had always been her weakest element, but more importantly than that, it caused her migranes. One was swelling up within her skull and she chuckled at the ridiculousness of it.

The sul'dam yanked her collar and fired a thousand needles throughout her body. At the same time Elia felt herself drawing on saidar again. Green. Just Earth. Pain bloomed: crippling, blissful pain. White and black flashes streaked across her vision. Pain to the edges of ecstasy; pleasure to the heights of torture.


The earth began to shake underneath the thin soles of Ravak's boots. The woman in the lightning bolt dress glared with an intensity that rivaled Mirin's. At her feet, Elia was curled in upon herself. Somehow he ignored both his own pain and his sister's. The ko'di existed only for one purpose -- death.

He stumbled as the cobblestones rose up and broke apart, but the trick was too little too late. Dropping the ashandarei to the ground, the Gaidin drew out his longsword in Unfolding the Fan.

The sul'dam's head parted from her neck.

The ko'di broke with Elia's screaming. Rav dropped to the ground in front of his sister. He took a hold of the silver collar around her neck but his failing strength couldn't pry it open.

"My ring," Elia said in a hoarse voice. "Push my ring onto the collar."

Lifting up his sister's withered hand, he did as instructed. When the Great Serpent ring made contact with the a'dam, the collar opened and fell to the ground. Ravak didn't even question it. He just drew his big sister into a hug.

"We need to leave," he said to her back.

"I know. I have a plan."


The Seanchan patrol that had entered this long-abandoned village hadn't expected to find anyone present, but there was always the chance that some rogue damane would hide out here. Bad damane did flee into the wilderness in defiance of their natural place. The inclusion of a member of the Deathwatch was rare, but the Blood had to have had a reason for it. The patrol didn't question the Blood's orders, nor the Empress's.

The rank-and-file were more than aghast at what had transpired whilst they searched the rest of the village. The sul'dam was dead, but more harrowingly the Deathwatch was dead. There was panic amongst the ranks. Someone was going to pay dearly for this.

On the top story of one of the buildings near the square, the Darrow twins hid. Aside from the near-blinding pain of using Earth and of the sul'dam's death whilst being linked via the a'dam, and aside from the cold and her, you know, pregnancy, Elia was in a better shape than her brother. She used Healing on him, which was only enough to cease the injuries from being lethal, but he was going to be left with a wicked scar on his side. She then used the rest of her energy to form a ward around them, hiding them from sight. They sat in silence, utterly exhausted, whilst listening to the patrol squabble amongst themselves about how to handle this incident. Ravak smiled at the use of such a carefully-chosen word.

"We are never doing this again," he whispered a short time after the patrol had finally departed.

"Agreed." The Aes Sedai had taken the a'dam into her possession, and she was playing with the bracelet. "Never again."

Rav stood up using the ashandarei for support, then assisted Elia to her feet. They slowly stumbled their way outside and into the frozen night air. The bar of silver light brightened Rav's heart, but it practically lurched when the square rent in reality actually opened. Mia seemed to bolt into existence, and her beautiful face was standing waiting on the other side of the Channelling Yards.

Rav wasted no time in hurrying through to grab a hold of her. He hugged her around the waist with his left arm, still propping himself up with the ashandarei in his right.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered into her neck. "I'm so, so sorry." It wasn't until that moment that Ravak realised how much he'd betrayed Miahala's trust in him. Like Kaia and the Waste all over again, Ravak was afraid he'd made another lasting mistake.


Although he was just a distant knot in her mind while he was away with his sister, Miahala knew that something more was going on than what she had been told. Fear twisted into tangle after tangle in her heart and she thought she might actually die (again) from that feeling alone.

Not again. Not again. Not again. Please, Creator, I can’t lose this one.

She waited in the channeling yards for the slash of silver. Everything else be damned, she’d wait here forever...and if he didn’t return soon, she would bloody well start looking for him until either she found him, or… No. Not that.

Finally, she saw it. She gasped.

As he rushed to her, she rushed to him. She didn’t care if there was anyone watching. They could all go to the Dark One for all they mattered to her in that instantly. She collided with him as he held her, apologizing.

She pulled away enough to take his face in her hands and kiss him, his lips and his cheeks and his forehead. As if testing each part of him to be assured he was real. “Don’t do that to me again,” she breathed when she finally settled her head against him. “Please, I can’t take the strain, love. Stay with me.”


As he pulled back from the embrace, Elia appeared contritely at their side. Her gaze danced between the Gaidin Captain and the Captain-General. "I..." she started, before her eyes rose up to the blade on the ashandarei. Those malachite orbs widened briefly, before they turned onto Miahala. "Apologies sister," Elia said in a not-at-all-sorry voice. "I seem to have returned your Warder in an improved state than when I borrowed him."

Rav frowned. What? A better state? The hell does that mean? Elia couldn't lie, so something...

Looking up at the weapon in his hand, he spotted now what his sister had seen a moment prior. A heron stood out on the edge of the blade. A Blademaster's heron.

Ravak sighed loudly. Then he laughed. Then he shook his head in amusement. "Mia, I think we ought to go to the infirmary. We need Gareth to fetch his wife, so I can pick out one of her blades to keep."