Fanfic:Loss and Determination
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This is a piece of fanfiction. Only the original author(s) or Librarian(s) should make content changes to this page. |
"Master Valin!" the little girl yelled, pounding on the heavy wooden door. "Please hurry!"
As she lifted her hand to knock again, the door swung open with a terrible creak. "Joaynna al'Jay, what is the meaning of this?" thundered the large woman at the door.
Joaynna gulped. Mistress Valin was enough to frighten anybody in the village, never mind a nine-year-old girl! "Mistress Valin, my sister...She fainted down by the pond..." Joaynna managed.
"Well why didn't you say so sooner, child?" Joaynna glared angrily at the woman as she turned around to yell for her husband and eldest son. Of all people, it had to be Mistress Valin...Joaynna pushed the thought out of her head. She was a grim, mean old woman, but she was willing to help, and that was what mattered. The two men appeared behind Mistress Valin in what seemed to Joaynna to be a matter of seconds, and at Mistress Valin's command, Joaynna led them all to her sister. They lifted her from the ground gently and carried her to the home of the al'Jays with Mistress Valin shouting orders the entire way. Joaynna wanted to clap her hands over her ears.
When they arrived at the al'Jay's, Joaynna led them to her sister's room. The men carefully placed her sister on the bed. Mistress Valin finally lowered her voice, asking Joaynna to find her mother and demanding that her son summon the Wisdom. Joaynna ran off eagerly, her head spinning both from Mistress Valin's tirade on the way over and from her fear for her sister.
"Mother!" she cried, stumbling on the stairs in her haste. "Where are you?" Joaynna tore through the house in search of her. She dashed around a corner and nearly smacked into her mother.
"Joaynna, what did I tell you about running in..." Realizing her daughter was deathly pale and her blue eyes were wide with worry, she stopped. "Honey, what's wrong?" she asked gently. She lowered herself so she could look Joaynna in the eye. "What happened?"
"Laine...she fainted..." Joaynna took a deep breath to hold back the tears she felt forming in her eyes.
"Joaynna, where is she?" her mother asked hastily. Joaynna grabbed her hand and led her, half-walking, half-running, down the stairs and into Laine's room. Joaynna stared at her sister. She looks so helpless...She bit her lip and turned away, again refraining from crying.
Master Valin spoke. "We've sent for the Wisdom, Elsa," he told Joaynna's mother softly. Joaynna was thankful his wife hadn't spoken; she already had a headache. "Laine is going to be fine."
Elsa al'Jay nodded, but her worry was clearly etched on her face. This was the second time her daughter had fainted in the past week. She leaned over Laine and put a hand to her forehead, confirming her suspicions. "Light, she's burning up," she whispered.
Then Joaynna heard the door open. She ran to meet the village Wisdom, Arina Eaker. "Where is she, child?" she inquired softly. Concern was plain in her brown eyes. "You don't look so well yourself, child." Joaynna motioned for Arina to follow her.
"My, my, the girl has a terrible fever." Arina still called Laine "girl" although she was seventeen and had been told by the Women's Circle that she was old enough to braid her hair. It fit, however; the maternal Wisdom looked old enough to be her grandmother.
Elsa stared at Arina with wide eyes. "Will she be okay?" Seeing the distress on her mother's face, Joaynna went over to her without a word and squeezed her hand tightly.
"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing, Elsa," Arina replied gently. "She will be on her feet again before you know it." She paused for a moment, still examining Laine. "But please, I need some space," she said, dismissing Joaynna and the Valins with a wave of her hand.
"Now run along, Joaynna," her mother said softly. "You heard Arina; Laine will be fine." Reluctantly, Joaynna left.
She wandered silently through the house and finally sat down on the second stair. Light, please let her be okay...With that thought, the scalding tears Joaynna had held back for her mother's sake came flowing down her cheeks, and the vivid memories of what had just occurred came rushing back to her.
It was the worst one yet. Laine had fainted before, but this time, Joaynna had been truly frightened.
She and Laine were sitting by the pond, chatting. Joaynna was telling her sister a story when she realized Laine wasn't listening. Instead, she was staring intently at the pond.
"Laine?" she said. "Laine, are you okay?" She touched her shoulder. Still not looking at her little sister, Laine rose to her feet, her eyes still focused on the water.
Suddenly, the water stirred. A wave formed and washed up on to the grass around their feet. A second, more forceful wave did the same. Joaynna stared at the pond open-mouthed. Tearing her eyes away, she turned to her sister. Laine had a glazed look in her eyes, and before Joaynna could ask her what was wrong, Laine began to fall. At the same time, another wave soaked Joaynna's dress nearly to her waist. Joaynna let out a little shriek and grabbed her sister's arm, trying to slow her fall. She glanced quickly at the pond again and was shocked to see it perfectly calm, just as it had been only seconds before. She remembered going for help...But most of that was a blur.
Joaynna snapped out of her reverie as someone touched her arm. Startled, she turned around to face her best friend, Emma. Emma hugged her. "I heard what happened," she said. "No need to cry; Arina says she will be fine." Joaynna brushed her tears away with her sleeve and managed to give her friend a tiny smile. "My father has an interesting visitor at the inn, Joaynna. Maybe you would like to meet her?" Joaynna nodded. She needed something, anything, to get her mind off Laine. "Come with me, then," Emma replied brightly.
They walked slowly to the inn, Emma keeping up a steady stream of conversation along the way. Joaynna just listened to her, not saying more than a couple words. She was thankful Emma wasn't expecting her to respond.
When they arrived, Emma led her into the common room. Three men were sitting talking in the corner. The only other people in the room were Emma's father and the tall, elaborately dressed woman he was speaking with. "That's her," Emma whispered. "She just arrived today."
The woman was unlike anyone Joaynna had ever seen before. For one, her long, dark hair hung loose to her waist; all the women in the village braided their hair. Her dress was made of a fine, deep green silk, as was her matching embroidered cloak. He face was smooth and young-looking, but somehow she gave Joaynna the impression that she was older than her mother. The woman tilted her head slightly and her eyes flickered over the two girls. A tiny smile touched her lips, but it was gone again in an instant, and her attention reverted back to the innkeeper as if she had never even seen Joaynna or Emma. Joaynna found herself wondering if she had imagined the glance. "Who is she?" Joaynna whispered.
"Father says she's a very special guest," Emma replied just as softly. "She stayed here once, before I was born." She tugged on Joaynna's sleeve. "She's busy. Let's come back later."
They walked together for about an hour until dusk set in, stopping once to talk to friends. Joaynna was still quieter than usual, but she was feeling genuinely better. Soon after, they returned to the al'Jay's house to check on Laine.
Arina still remained; she was speaking softly with Joaynna's mother in the kitchen. She gave the girls a warm smile when they came in and told them Laine was doing fine. The two girls looked in on her. Her face was flushed, but she was sleeping comfortably.
Every morning, Joaynna would check on her sister before she went outside, and then again around noon and at night. Sometimes Laine was awake, and although she felt weak, she chatted with her little sister once in awhile, and everything seemed to be the way should be.
Several days later, Joaynna went to see Laine for their noon visit, and she was gone. Joay nna searched the house, but her sister wasn't there. She decided Laine must have felt up to going for a walk, and she went back outside to look for her.
She stepped out the door just in time to see Laine bidding farewell to the strange woman from the inn. Laine's eyes were troubled as she turned toward the house, but Joaynna dismissed it as tiredness. She ran out to meet her. "Laine, you're feeling better!" she exclaimed, giving her a hug. "I'm so glad." She looked up at her sister and was surprised to see tears in her eyes. "Laine?" she said, the worry evident in her voice, "Are you okay? Do you need Arina?" Light, please, don't let her be getting sick again...
"No, it's no that..." she said. Her voice trailed off. She sat in the grass and took Joaynna's hands in hers. "Jo, I'm going away." Only Laine and Emma called Joaynna by her nickname. Laine paused and took a long, deep breath to stop her voice from quivering, and Joaynna stared at her.
"What...What are you talking about?" the words faded on her lips as she saw a tear slide down Laine's face.
"Jo, do you remember the stories about Aes Sedai?" Joaynna nodded, still not understanding. "I...she says..." Laine swallowed. "I have to go away....to be trained to be an Aes Sedai."
Joaynna opened her mouth to say something and closed it again when no sound came out. Tears were brimming in her own eyes, and she buried her face in her hands. Laine hugged her, her own tears falling into Joaynna's hair. They remained that way for a few minutes, neither of them speaking. Finally, Joaynna raised her head. "Why, Laine? Why?"
"I was born with the ability, Jo," she said. She wasn't crying now, but a stray tear fell, and she wiped it away. Her eyes had a sadness in them that Joaynna had never noticed before; she was sure it hadn't been there a few days ago. "That's why I've been fainting so much," she continued. Joaynna's tears had stopped now, too; she was too stunned to cry. She studied her sister as if she was seeing her for the first time. It explained so much -- the pond, the strange sicknesses...And she knew now that the woman from the inn had to be an Aes Sedai. Joaynna sighed deeply and asked the question she was dreading, the one she had to have answered.
"Laine, when are you leaving?" She wanted to look away from the pain in her sister's eyes and pretend none of this was happening, but she forced herself to keep a steady gaze and listen to her.
Laine bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes. Opening them again, she looked into her sister's frightened blue eyes, a mirror reflection of her own. "Tomorrow, Jo. At dawn. I'm going with her." There was no need to say who she was speaking of; Joaynna knew she meant the Aes Sedai from the inn. Joaynna felt numb; she couldn't even cry.
"What about Mother and Father?" Joaynna finally said. The words came tumbling out of her.
"Mother already knows," she said softly. The Aes Sedai told her." She gulped. "But she doesn't know I'm leaving tomorrow. Please, you can't tell her; she would never let me go." Joaynna's eyes widened, but she nodded. She knew her sister was right. Laine sighed deeply. "I'm going to leave her a note in the morning." Joaynna just nodded again.
They spent the rest of the day together, chatting as they always used to do. Every once in awhile, Joaynna felt as if everything had just been a dream and that it was going to be just fine, the way it used to be, but then she would look at her sister and see the intense loss in her eyes and she knew it was all real, that it was all happening.
Joaynna cried herself to sleep that night. Her sister was very close to her, maybe even closer than Emma, and she couldn't even begin to contemplate what life without her would be like. The next morning, however, Joaynna was up before sunrise with a new determination.
She found Laine in her room finishing her packing. She slipped in silently and helped her. Neither of them said a word; they didn't need to. When they walked out to the stable to get Laine's mare, they found Emma and the Aes Sedai waiting. Emma didn't have any sisters, so she had basically adopted Laine as her big sister, and when Joaynna had told her, she had promised to be up to see her off. Emma had tears in her eyes, but she brushed them away. Joaynna and Laine were both beyond tears. They embraced each other warmly for a long moment. "Laine," Joaynna whispered fiercely, "We will see each other again. We will." Laine smiled sadly at the conviction in her little sister's voice. When Joaynna set her mind to something, she rarely backed down. She could only hope that somehow, somewhere, they would meet again...
Soon it was time for them to leave. Joaynna and Emma stood together and watched in silence until the horses rode out of sight. When they had disappeared over the horizon, Joaynna sighed and turned to Emma. "Someday I will go to the Tower and see her again," Joaynna said resolutely. Emma stared at her, too stunned to speak. She hadn't expected such conviction in her voice after the events of the past few days.
Finally Emma found words. "Jo, I don't know if you can just do that," she began slowly. "Maybe you have to be an Aes Sedai or something..."
"Then I'll become an Aes Sedai, Emma," she said calmly. "If Laine can do it, so can I." Her lips were set in a tight line, and her gaze fell beyond Emma. Her eyes sparkled as if they held a secret. Emma knew that look all too well; Joaynna had made up her mind.
Little did Joaynna know that she too had been born with the ability to channel...
